How to unlock your inner resilience to move forward with strength and positivity

Updated: Dec 19, 2020

Depending what website, you read psychological and emotional resilience relates to the ability to come back stronger after being knocked back by life’s adversities.

But I believe resilience isn’t just about ‘bouncing back’ to how you were before something ‘bad’ happened. It’s also about how you adapt to a mentally, physically or emotionally challenging situation and stay well when facing those challenges.

Perhaps you don’t consider yourself a resilient person. But here’s the really amazing news……

The dictionary definition of RESILIENCE is;

1. The capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness

2. The ability of a substance to spring back into shape; elasticity

Resilience isn’t who or what you are. It is a skill that you can learn and develop.

But you can’t learn or develop resilience if life is all cupcakes and unicorns! You need challenges in order to put the theory into practice and developed finely honed skills. Which takes me to the next bit of amazing news…

Nobody’s life is cupcakes and unicorns – no matter what their social media accounts might suggest. And that means you can develop resilience and learn how to become stronger as a result of life’s challenges.

Identifying true resilience

Look around and ask yourself, who are the people you consider resilient?

Chances are they are the people who have faced enormous challenges and come out fighting;

Survivors of oppression or genocide.

Survivors of horrific accidents or unimaginable abuse.

Survivors or life changing illness.

People for whom life is one ‘disaster’ after another yet still they smile. All of those people have one thing in common. They had the resilience to face their adversities and achieve in spite of them.

Eight steps to building resilience

Here are eight steps you can take to develop your own inner resilience.

No more negativity

Learning to reframe negativity takes time but in order to develop resilience you have to learn to recognise when you are dwelling on the negative thoughts and consciously stop them. At first it will take hard work and determination but as you develop new neuro pathways, it’ll become easier to tune out the negativity and focus instead on what you need to do to move forward from a situation.

This isn’t the same as positive thinking. It’s about taking an action that stops the negative thought patterns